The Agony of ......?

I've been struggling with something for quite awhile now and even now as I begin this journey I'm scared out of my wits. I have the ability to do it. I want it. For me! How is it you can be so conscious of something and yet not have the power to overcome it? How can you want something more than anything, yet never take a step towards it? These are questions I ask myself on a daily basis. Over and over I fill my head with these questions.....

Am I afraid of success or failure? Isn't success something you create in your own mind? Don't we create our own reality? If that's true, why do I agonize myself.... Self sabotage is an awful thing. The dictionary definition of sabotage is "an act or process tending to hamper or hurt" or "deliberate subversion". Well I'm saying today.... I'm done with that. I'm going for it! It's going to hurt like hell - but I'm going for it. This is it!

"Too often we are scared. Scared of what we might not be able to do. Scared of what people might think if we tried. We let our fears stand in the way of our hopes. We say no when we want to say yes. We sit quietly when we want to scream. And we shout with the others, when we should keep our mouths shut. Why? After all,we do only go around once. There's really no time to be afraid. So stop. Try something you've never tried. Risk it. Enter a triathlon. Write a letter to the editor. Demand a raise. Call winners at the toughest court. Throw away your television. Bicycle across the United States. Try bobsledding. Try anything. Speak out against the designated hitter. Travel to a country where you don't speak the language. Patent something. You have nothing to lose and everything everything everything to gain. JUST DO IT." - 1992: Barry Sanders

A Poem

A Poem Of You Tell On Yourself...

You Tell On YOURSELF By Friends You Keep
By Simple Very Manner In Which You Speak
By How You Employ Your Leisure Time
By How You Spend Your Dollar And Dime

You Tell On Yourself By Things You Wear
By Spirit In Which Your Burdens Bear
By The Things At Which You Laugh
By Music You Play On Your Record Player

You Tell On Yourself By The Way You Walk
By Things In Which You Delight To Talk
By The Manner In Which You Bear Defeat
By So Simple A Thing As How You Eat
By Books You Choose From Well Filled Shelf
By Dumb Or Great Poem That You Write

In These Ways More You Tell On Yourself
So,There Is No Particle Of Sense In Effort To Keep Up False Pretense...
Make Peace With Your False Pretense!

Author Unknown

Put Your Hands Up!

You just can't help but laugh! The more I hear the funnier it gets!.... When the call came in on Tuesday of last week I was a little panicked. Knowing that my husband and son where traveling on the wintry roads I was prepared for anything. But when the gal on the phone explained that she was calling from Chico PD I knew I was okay as far as my family was concerned. Of course she did not have her facts straight and could not answer most of my questions. Huh?.... She was the one calling me, right?..... Short of it was - that during the course of a high speed chase (stolen vehicle) the vehicle driven by a 16 year old missed the corner and ran up on my neighbors yard, grazed the side of their house and ran into our fence. Of course they knocked out our irrigation system, thus the water had to be shut off. Unfortunately/Fortunately neither the neighbor nor us were home at the time! We ended up coming home 2 days early so we could take care of the repairs - that was our saving grace! It literally took Kevin 3 days to get it working again. I have the muddy clothes and boots to prove it!.....

So I was a little surprised yesterday afternoon when we were leaving the house and hearing someone say "Can I talk with you for a minute". I looked up and saw a Police car sitting across the street and an officer walking towards me. He introduced himself as the arresting officer. After a few minutes of story comparison..... He tells me that they arrested the driver hiding inside our boat at gunpoint. Apparently the older guy jumped the fence and hid behind someones air conditioning unit. I had heard from a neighbor that they thought they were hiding behind ours - which I found disturbing! But the younger driver had run through our yard and jumped into our old boat and hid under the carpeting and was using his cell phone to "phone a friend", guess he was looking for a ride....! From what the officer told me they nailed him by following his muddy footprints..... Now if that isn't funny I don't know what is! Dumb criminals!

And now this morning we woke up to a broken window in the front of the house. Apparently we have enemies! Or at least the dispatcher is obligated to ask me that question. It was the bedroom window on my side and either I'm a deep sleeper or it happened when we were gone but never noticed until this morning. Oh well - it's covered under our "lifetime guarantee" So no harm no foul!.... Starting the year off right!.....